Trauma & Loss

TRAUMA

The term ‘trauma’ is often used to describe a deeply disturbing experience. But what really is meant by that?  We have all experienced some form of trauma. Often, we recover from traumatic incidences naturally – we bounce back and regain our balance. However, if the incident is severe and/or we have not had the support and care after the incident to come to terms with it or to understand it, it will change how we see the world and ourselves. If we have experienced trauma on an ongoing basis, such as growing up in a family where our needs where not met on a physical and/or emotional level, we might not even be aware that we are experiencing post trauma reactions. For example, reactions can manifest through an inability to take care of ourselves, having difficulties in setting boundaries or that we no longer feel safe or are unable to function in our day to day life.

Trauma not only manifests in the brain but also in the body. Often trauma causes all sorts of symptoms because the body is on high alert all the time. We might be constantly feeling anxious, tense, depressed or disconnected from ourselves and others. Having a sense of low self-worth, deep feelings of shame and guilt and needing to distract ourselves to get through. These reactions are all signs of us trying to cope and manifestations of something that is troubling our body and mind, whether conscious or subconscious.

Coming to terms with trauma means to understand what is going on in our bodies and minds and why we are behaving and feeling the way we do. In the counselling sessions I can help you to make sense of it, heal old wounds and regain a sense of balance and enjoyment of life.  

LOSS & GRIEF

We experience loss in different ways throughout our lives. Grief often refers to how we feel after someone close to us has died. Everybody’s emotional response is different when confronted with this. Some say that they became very anxious and frightened, others numb, angry or that they could not believe what had happened; it felt unreal. The way you feel might impact  your day to day life, you might not be able to work anymore, or feel guilty to do any of the things you enjoyed, you might feel the world is passing by and you are not part of it anymore. Sometimes there are changes involved that can be very stressful and overwhelming, for example after a lifelong period being with someone now having to live alone or having to take on new tasks in the household.

How you feel and react is dependent on various circumstances, for example what kind of relationship you had to the person you have lost, if it triggers any other losses you have experienced previously and the way in which the person has died.

In the counselling sessions I can help you to explore how you feel, untangle thoughts and feelings, help you regain a sense of control and come to terms with the loss you have experienced.